What is a human? Once again my mind has broken itself towards questioning both my sanity and my humanity. Once upon a time I took my life as a care-free scenario; I had fun and toyed with things as they came. However at some point I became aware of the world around me, people ignore it for the purpose of hiding from the truth. This world will rape and kill you at any moment, but only if you let it. I have never planned to let it occur, and in truth my life scares me. I don’t know what’s around the corner and I constantly feel that I could be taken down at any time. I have to constantly be aware of myself, because I know that any false move will destroy me. My life is dedicated to my future and for the time being that is how it has to be. At the moment my current life is fine I have a wonderful girlfriend, good family, a job. But none of these things can save me from failing in the future. I am constantly trying to claw may way out of the life I’ve been thrown into but it is difficult and yes I do know that I don’t have it as bad as others. One may say that I merely contradict myself in saying that I have a lot of good things at the top but I do.
As previously mentioned the world seems to be holding me back and sometimes that includes those I hold close. I can do so much and yet none of it is allowed to occur.
At some points I feel like all of this is for nothing, I feel like turning my back on the world and escaping to another location but it is not possible. The people around me don’t understand. They either don’t live my style of life or have never had to live one that they feel hinders them. I would not bother the ones who do understand it would be much better to let them be as I see most leave me.
At some point in life things must change. And if they do not then the point of life loses its meanings.
This is addressed to those who wonder what swims in my mind.